When I was little we had one cutesy cardboard cutout decoration on the window. My mom wasn't much of a fan of the holiday and most years we didn't decorate at all. My mom also chose my costumes. The better quality ones I wanted were too expensive, so I wore those 80s plastic character dresses that came with a mask. At least I got to be She-Ra one year. 🗡️
As a teen, Halloween allowed me to express and explore sides of my personality that weren't allowed to be shown the rest of the year. I wasn't allowed to dress very sexy, and I've always had a darker side. For one day a year I got to push those boundaries and be more me.
My first year in college I bought tons of decorations for my dorm room. I definitely went overboard, but it wasn't just about the decorations (although I didn't realize it until now). In a way, Halloween became a celebration of my freedom to finally decorate and dress and be all of me.
Halloween is still one of my favorite holidays. I look forward to shopping for new decorations each year, and decorate my house inside and out (although some years not until the day of - that's life with chronic illness). When I have the ability and a costume in mind, I dress up. Whether I have somewhere to go or not.
This year I've been struggling to feel it, as I'm sure a lot of us are. Shopping online for decorations wasn't as fun, I didn't get my mini pumpkin because I can't go to the grocery store (and spaced asking my hubby to pick one up), and decorating had to wait until Halloween week. But, I'm still doing the things I can to try and enjoy it how I can. That's all we can do. And even if it feels a little flatter this year (I'll miss seeing the trick-or-treaters), it's still worth the effort to celebrate. To live life as normally (and safely) as we can. 💜
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Hubby surprised me and brought home a mini pumpkin! 😁
As we wait for election results today and the next few days, please be kind to yourself and lean into your self-care. 💜
The Purple Tilde Ring in Antique Copper is available in the shop.